Finding this chart of “Emotions & Feelings” on Pinterest today, I was reminded of a time when I was worrying and feeling high anxiety due to a stressful event that had my emotions inside out and upside down. All I could do was pace the room and look out the window every other minute. I’d sit down and get right back up and pace again. My hands would fist, open, only to fist again. My heart raced and I was sweating that smelly kind of sweat associated with fear.
As I paced, I realized that there was absolutely nothing I could do about the situation and all this pacing was getting me nowhere.
My thoughts turned to writing and how difficult it was, at times, to capture an emotion of anger, fear, worry, or anxiety, especially when I was feeling happy.
I thought, Why not write down my emotions and observations of my body’s reactions? Then when I was writing a scene where I needed those physical traits and words, they’d be at hand.
Immediately, I set to work capturing what I was feeling, quickly absorbed in the project, which then led to writing a scene that I’d earlier been struggling with before this event had taken place. A couple of hours later, exhausted by the writing, I stopped and only then realized I’d mentally moved beyond the event.
Looking back at it entire situation, I also realized that all that anxiety was for naught, as it was pure reactionary feelings, with no resolution. It was one of my first experiences of learning how to let go, to back away with trying to resolve a situation that I would have only made worse had I responded.
Since that time, I’ve learned that whenever I’m facing a situation where I find myself steeped with worry, reactionary thoughts, or fear of the outcome, I need to let it go, realize that the situation will be okay in time, and to bury myself in some type of writing or creative process.
More than once, the craft of writing has rescued me from myself.